The immature cantelopes make good chew toys for your dog...
And if you laquer them and wax them with furniture polish to preserve them, you can put them on your windowsill and fool people into believing that you're a culinary vegetarian genius...
And maybe your ex-wife might accidently bite into one...
And keep one of the Time Life Cook Books nearby so nobody will ever suspect you only eat grilled steaks and batter-dipped bacon...and sausage links with Aunt Jamima syrup all over them...and wedding cake dipped in fudge for dessert...the upsidedown fake veggies provide a good "psyche" to your guilty mind and clogged arteries...
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